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A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey.

Discussion in 'Humor Talk' started by Fishface1911, Dec 7, 2011.

  1. Fishface1911

    Fishface1911 Master of Puppets.

    He orders a drink and while he's drinking,
    the monkey jumps all around the place. The monkey grabs some olives off the bar and
    eats them. Then he grabs some sliced limes and eats them. He then jumps onto the pool
    table and grabs one of the billiard balls. To everyone's amazement, he sticks it in
    his mouth, and somehow swallows it whole. The bartender screams at the guy, "Did you
    see what your monkey just did?"

    "No, what?"

    "He just ate the cue ball off my pool table... whole!"

    "Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy, "he eats everything in sight.
    Sorry! I'll pay for the cue ball and stuff."

    The guy finishes his drink, pays his bill, pays for the stuff the monkey ate and
    leaves.

    Two weeks later the guy is in the bar again, and has his monkey with him. He orders a
    drink and the monkey starts running around the bar again. While the man is finishing
    his drink, the monkey finds a maraschino cherry on the bar. He grabs it, sticks it
    up his butt, pulls it out, and eats it.


    Then the monkey finds a peanut, and again sticks it up his butt, pulls it out, and
    eats it.

    The bartender is disgusted. "Did you see what your monkey did just now?"

    "No, what?" replied the man.

    "Well, he stuck both a maraschino cherry and a peanut up his butt, pulled them out, and
    ate them!" said the bartender.

    "Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy. "He still eats everything in
    sight, but ever since he had to **** that cue ball out, he measures everything first now."

    :Rolling::Rolling:
     
  2. Alan

    Alan Proud Infidel

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  3. Hunt22-250

    Hunt22-250 Scuba Steve

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  4. mworkman

    mworkman Well-Known Member

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  5. Jazz

    Jazz Warsaw Warrior

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  6. DIXIEDOG

    DIXIEDOG Prostaff for Taylor worms

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  7. way2slickrick

    way2slickrick Ohhhhh Yeaaaa

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