Mid-Week Funnies

Went to our local bar with my wife last night. Locals started shouting
"pedophile!" and other names at me, just because my wife is
24 and I'm 50. It completely spoiled our 10th anniversary.



My wife has been missing a week now. The police said to prepare for the
worst. So, I had to go down to Goodwill to get all of her clothes back.


The Red Cross just knocked on my door and asked if we could contribute
towards the floods in Pakistan. I said we'd love to, but our garden hose
only reaches the driveway.


The cost of living has now gotten so bad that my wife is having sex with
me because she can't afford batteries.

 

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