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Ventriloquist

Discussion in 'Humor Talk' started by mworkman, Nov 4, 2010.

  1. mworkman

    mworkman Well-Known Member

    An Australian ventriloquist visiting New Zealand walks
    into a Small village and sees a local sitting on his veranda patting his dog.

    He figures he'll have a little fun, so he says to the Kiwi

    'G'day, mind if I talk to your dog?'

    Villager: 'The dog doesn't talk, you stupid Aussie.'

    Ventriloquist: 'Hello dog, how's it going mate?'

    Dog: 'Yeah, doin' all right.'

    Kiwi: (look of extreme shock)

    Ventriloquist: 'Is this villager your owner?' (pointing at the Villager)

    Dog: 'Yep'

    Ventriloquist: 'How does he treat you?'

    Dog: 'Yeah, real good. He walks me twice a day, feeds me
    great food And takes me to the lake once a week to play.'

    Kiwi: (look of utter disbelief)

    Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your horse?'

    Kiwi: 'Uh, the horse doesn't talk either . . . I think.'

    Ventriloquist: 'Hey horse, how's it going?'

    Horse: 'Cool'

    Kiwi: (absolutely dumbfounded)

    Ventriloquist: 'Is this your owner?' (Pointing at the villager)

    Horse: 'Yep'

    Ventriloquist: How does he treat you?

    Horse: 'Pretty good, thanks for asking. He rides me regularly,
    Brushes me down often and keeps me in the shed to protect me
    from the Elements.'

    Kiwi: (total look of amazement)

    Ventriloquist: 'Mind if I talk to your sheep?'

    Kiwi: (in a panic) 'The sheep's a f******' liar......'
     
  2. bamafishin

    bamafishin Well-Known Member

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  3. cd4th

    cd4th Shoot first, shoot again

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  4. Hunt22-250

    Hunt22-250 Scuba Steve

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  5. Nebguy

    Nebguy Awesome Eric!!

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  6. DIXIEDOG

    DIXIEDOG Prostaff for Taylor worms

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