Hardest thing, but it's time....

Only a few of our closet friends know this, and we have kept it under the radar for a few months and it's possibly the hardest thing I've ever had to deal with. But, it's time to tell it here because you all are our family too. But, Doc and I are splitting up. After almost 22 years. Over the last few years, since around 2007, I haven't been the best husband to her. No,there wasn't any infidelity issues, but more like compatibility issues. My interests have changed and hers has too. Doc is a great woman and has been a tremendous friend to me for all these years. She is the type that wears her emotions on her sleeve and I do too, to a degree. I'm very passionate about some things, most of you are aware of some of them. And I am passionate about Doc, the things we have in common, the places we've been to, the people we have met, Alabama football, Syracuse basketball and Lacrosse, and our life has been a wonderful ride. But, I don't think I was as passionate about being married to her or the marriage in general. I have no clue how to deal with the dynamic of a relationship, all I know is that I love her very much and will always do. The last few years have been a little tedious as I have not been the best husband or the best half of this marriage. She's done all the emotional burden carrying, I was always just getting by and going to work everyday. I tried college again and couldn't get thru a subject and could not continue. I guess I just didn't do enough with my half of the marriage. I admit, I have dragged my feet somewhat, with the site, my plastics biz, I have the motivation and the zest for it, just don't know everything there is know to make them successful. I guess I will have to find a way now. I will move closer to work next weekend. She is allowing me to keep my boat and fishing stuff and my shop here. Because, you see, we are best friends, and we will continue to be. She will still be around here monitoring things for me while I'm working during the day or not around. I plan to be on here a lot in the future, trying to garner up some support for the site and make it more interesting.

It hurts, it hurts a lot, but I take the blame for it. I don't want this, but if it is what she needs to be happy, then, who am I to stand in her way. I respect that and respect her. As far as both of us being here, it should be the same as always. Treat us as you always do and did. I expect that. She helped to get this and the plastics biz for me. It's my turn to make it work now and get her a return on the investment she made for me. So, I have been holding this back a while now but I just cannot hold it in any longer.

For Doc, I'm sorry. Sorry for not being the man that fate should have paired you with. But, I will be there whenever you need me. Forever.

Ok, thanks for allowing me to vent a little. Carry on....

 

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