Wrong Man in Hell

One night this guy goes to bed and when he awakens he is standing at the Gates of Heaven and St. Peter is asking his name. He states his name and St. Peter looks at the list and informs the man that he is not on the list for Heaven so he must go down to Hell. The man is shocked and asks if St. Peter is sure about that, but St. Peter says he is not coming in and shows him to the elevator to go down. The man gets in the elevator and after a few minutes descending down the doors open and he is in Hell. Now this place smells awful, it is hot, humid, the lights are half out or blinking and there is sewage all over the floor. The man figures this is bull and he ain't about to live like this. When the devil comes to greet him he asks the devil why Hell is in such bad shape. The devil tells him that the A/C has been broken for centuries, the plumbing is busted, and the electrical service is old and messed up. The man tells the devil that he is an engineer and he could get a lot of this stuff fixed up with some help. Well the devil figures what the hell so he assigns some lost souls to help the engineer. As time goes on things start to improve in Hell.

God is talking to St. Peter a few months later and He mentions that He hasn't heard from the devil in a while and no one has been crying about Hell. God says it is odd so He decides to call Hell and see how it goes. God calls and the devil gets on the phone and God asks why He hasn't heard anything from Hell lately. The devil says that since the A/C has been repaired it is cool and dry now, the plumbing has been fixed so it smells great and there is no sewage and crud all over the floors anymore. The devil then tells God that the electrical service is almost complete but already most of the lights are back on and it is bright and cheerful down there. God is shocked and He asks the devil how did all this get done. The devil tells God that ever since he sent the engineer down there things are on the up and up. God asks what engineer, and the devil explains. God looks at St. Peter and then tells the devil there was a mistake and there are not supposed to be any engineers going to Hell. He said all engineers are supposed to be in Heaven so the devil has to send him back. The devil just laughed and told God there was no way he would send that engineer back. After a few minutes of arguing God simply told the devil, "Look. Send the engineer back up or I will sue you!" At that the devil laughed so hard he fell down on his clean new floor rolling around. God became angry and asked, What is so funny?" The devil still laughing managed to squeak out,

"Sue me?

Where are YOU going to get a lawyer?"

 

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